Connect with us

Entertainment

Fourth Hire Jobless Communists, Reality Shed’s Emergency Guide For Getting An Alt-Far-Left TV ‘News’ Network Commenced

Published

on

According to the left loud volume and repetition makes lies more believable, by Andy Reynolds/Getty Images via thebalancecareers.com
Spread the reality, RealityShed.Com --

You’ve got this great idea to cater to the left wing market for news and you’ve conveniently never heard of FakeNewsCNN (which firing Brian ‘POE-TAE-TOE’ Stelter won’t fix if you don’t fire the rest too, Discovery) or PMSDNC (AKA MSNBC) but you just can’t figure out how to get started. Well we in the shed have your back. Well not literally as we can’t stand you, but we do have a plan you can follow and it isn’t even mostly ours.

Imagine you are Rockstar. No not the video game company, the energy drink maker. That isn’t it? Okay imagine you are Onstar, the car service. Still not the one? Oh Nexstar, the media group! Okay, them. So you are Nexstar and you’ve actually just completed step 7 of 9. Let’s review the process.

You’ve already done the easy steps like having an agenda and a boatload of money, buying ‘superstation’ WGN (in 2019) and changing its name to WGN America, then buying up smaller left wing ‘news’ properties (such as TheShill, AKA The Hill, and also weirdly 75% of the CW) to merge with WGN America. Then you hired lefties to fully staff your behemoth’s ‘news’ team with true believers…in your agenda…which again is communism. You even hired an imported one (Canadian commie Ashleigh ‘rat’ Banfield was brought in January 2021), followed by known leftist legal thug Dan ‘weasel’ Abrams (who joined in July 2021).

Ashleigh Banfield devours stories, via wikipedia.org

That brings you to pretending you aren’t what you really are, which means leftism couched in reasonableness. So you make claims such as you are a “trusted source” and your “breaking news” is “delivered from the heartland” which is “where engaged citizens get news” and your news “represents the full range of perspectives across the country” and is a “source for unbiased U.S. news” that is “fact-based” and “America’s source for unbiased new” which obviously makes you “an unbiased national news cable network” filled with “veteran journalists” that still “draws on the local market, regional and national expertise” of “5,400 local journalists in 110 local newsrooms across the country”. What a load of bullshit.

Then since you thrive on shutting down alternate (AKA correct, patriotic, realistic, non-communist) points of view (so that only your message is heard) you remove* comment sections from your web sites and also push allegedly sound ideas such as taking untested death shots because they are good for you, or staying at home a year for safety, or that cloth is magical, or your kids are better off when the state makes decisions for them.

Dan Abrams focuses on an interview subject via animalia.bio

Now you change the name again and while the ‘news’ part is self evident (at least to strive for it), putting it first doesn’t make you better than anyone else doing ‘news’. The real problem though is calling yourself a ‘nation’ which is a bit grandiose. Better to start off as a territory or commonwealth or state, just like in reality you wouldn’t name yourself a skyscraper or mall or office building to start with.

We finally reach the current step, #7. In August 2022, they have hired CNN reject Chris ‘Fredo’ Cuomo who gets great ratings…when Trump is President AND it is an election year, but is morally a bottomless pit. They expect him to increase their primetime ratings (current average just 50,000 with 8,000 from the all-important 25-54 demographic advertisers covet, despite being a “national news and entertainment cable network reaching 75 million television households across the United States” which is roughly the same as Fox News Channel). CNN is worst of the ‘big three’ and does 762,000 and 190,000 in those, with MSNBC getting 1.2 million and 136,000, and #1 Fox News getting 2.4 million and 375,000 despite denying election theft and pushing the same lockdowns, masks and distancing the communists did.

Chris Cuomo arriving to sign his contract, Paramount Pictures ‘The Godfather’ by Maggie Weatherwax via quotesgram.com

Chris was fired in December 2021 after a law firm hired by CNN investigated his activities relating to conversations he had with his disgraced former New York Governor Andrew’s legal team. Andrews had been credibly accused of sexual harassment my many women. He had told his brother to stand his ground and not resign, which is the opposite advice he gives to victims of criminals (like his brother) and terrorists (like BLM and ANTIFA). He also told his brother to push back on cancel culture, despite canceling the culture of Americans regularly.

Cuomo says that “I’ve been jealous of you while I’ve been away watching. And I want to help. I want to find a way to help people. I’m going to come to NewsNation. And I want to build something special here. I want to work with Dan and work with the team here. They’ve got great people here who really hungry to make a difference in ways that I think matter. I have decided that I can’t go back to what people see as the big game. I don’t think I can make a difference there. I think we need insurgent media.” Yet some at ‘newsnation’ are angry Fredo is there and that they are being asked to stop promoting their own shows and only promote him.

Dan greets Chris upon his hiring, Paramount Pictures ‘The Godfather: Part II’ by AD123188 via youtube.com

Now you get low ratings, which is a given as nobody sane likes to be preached to or ridiculed and freedom is precious to real Americans. But you still call it a win as the left never admits they are wrong, it is always that communism just hasn’t been done properly yet.

You are there. You have finished all 9 steps and can bask in the glow, or whatever is generated by ‘green energy’. You:
1) have an agenda and a boatload of money
2) bought WGN and changed the name to WGN America
3) bought up a lot of smaller left wing ‘news’ properties to merge with WGN America
4) hired jobless communists
5) pretended to be unbiased but shut down commenting on your web sites
6) changed the name again to NewsNation
7) hired even more jobless communists
8) got low ratings
9) called it a win despite wasting money and not convincing anyone who wasn’t already a communist to become one

And staff can all stop worrying about Chris being the “big swinging dick”, because to those of us firmly entrenched in reality you are all big dicks. Congratulations!

*When Nexstar bought TheShill they removed the Disqus comment section, which honestly was a fucking pit of blackness and threats of death against Conservatives anyway, for which their ‘Mods’ feigned ignorance even when you pointed them right to the fucking message saying Republicans should all be lined up and shot in the head. Hopefully you ‘Mod’ fucks are now out of work.

You can find us on social media here:
https://gab.com/MisterGoldiloxx
https://parler.com/MisterGoldiloxx
AND
https://gettr.com/user/realityshed
https://twitter.com/RealityShed
https://truthsocial.com/@RealityShed

Parler is likely gone for good as of April 14, 2023.
Twitter account abandoned May 12, 2023, after Elon Musk hired WEF’er Linda Yaccarino as new CEO.

NOTE: We post new content regularly, and have a Comment section here in the shed (below every article), so please use it and help build the Reality community. If you enjoy our work please consider supporting Reality by using the “DonorBox” donation link, or the ‘Buy Me a Coffee‘ donation link…or both. Either way please bookmark us and help spread the word to family and friends. Thank you.

Entertainment

‘Taking a Kaep’, More Bewildering Nonsense From Feces-Obsessed Sports Host & Lawyer AND White Communist Mike Florio

Published

on

'So slavery is okay?', by mdokken29223, via 9gag.com. Communism isn't funny, but he is clownish.
Spread the reality, RealityShed.Com --

We have stated before that writing about the same subject more than once in a row is kind of boring, but we’ve done it before anyway. We even once wrote on the same basic topic for FOUR days in a row (HERE, HERE, HERE and HERE).

And sure enough, he lied to get that position and hasn’t followed through on his promises (including releasing the J6 videos, despite leaks proving what the left claim happened in fact did not). But that is a topic for another time.

“Unpopular but true… (commies strike back)”, by trumpwatching, via 9gag.com. His fellow communists are all proud of Colin. And ALL lives matter or black lives can’t matter, plus it is ridiculous for them to matter any more than any other lives do.

Today we are (sort of) “Groundhog Day’ing” Mike Florio (just dealt with HERE), while mainly focusing on the ‘anti-Rick Monday‘, Colin Kaepernick (covered prior HERE).

Colin was “28-30 as a starter for his career, and was 3-16 in his last two seasons”. That is NOT a great track record, and the often derided Tim Tebow was actually 8-6.

“Politics aside, this is good.”, by MEMES of the NFL (aka NFL Memes), via facebook.com. Some people enjoy being perpetual victims.

While correctly admitting that Colin’s NFL career was over, unless someone decides to take a deep dive into both insanity and communism, Florio attributed it to the wrong cause.

The headline was “It’s over for Colin Kaepernick, and it has been”, which on its face sounds reasonable, but as is so often true, ‘the devil is in the details’.

“To be fair, I haven’t seen Kaepernick throw over any mountains… (IG:scottcerjance)”, by MEMES of the NFL(aka NFL Memes), via facebook.com. Aaron Hernandez was both still alive AND in prison at the time that meme was still posted (March 23, 2017), but even now that he is dead (and out of prison…) it is STILL accurate.

Colin played his last game in the NFL on Saturday, January 2, 2017 (the last regular season game for the 49ers during the 2016 season; Mike claimed the game was played on New Year’s day), leading a 23-25 losing effort against the Seattle Seahawks, ending their season at 2-14.

One leftist search engine doesn’t even list him as a football player. Instead they label him as an “American civil rights activist”, which is code for someone who pushes communism, as nobody right of center is even labeled that, even people championing the 2nd Amendment (because self-defense is the ultimate civil right).

“An example of a meme showing a negative reaction to Kaepernick’s protest.”, by unknown, via ResearchGate on researchgate.net. We realize the quality of this meme is poor (blurry), but we are using it anyway because watching professional sports is a waste of time, especially since so many communists use them to push their politics. And college sports are where communist pro athletes come from, so stop kidding yourself that those are any better.

But with the new ‘New York Jets’ QB Aaron Rodgers’ season-ending Achilles injury, Colin decided to both have his agent contact the team, and then when he didn’t hear back he wrote them a letter himself.

After not hearing back for 5 days, the letter was ‘leaked’, obviously by Colin’s camp, in an effort to shame the Jets into replying.

Mike correctly states that “The fact that so much time has passed since he last played…makes it even less likely that anyone will give him a chance.” before then going off of the rails, adding that “It has simply been too long. It has been too long in part because the NFL successfully colluded against and blackballed Kaepernick.”

“Happy 4th, Colin”, tweet by unknown, meme by chaffer2, via 9gag.com. Black people are paid millions of dollars to act, sing and play sports. They work in politics, TV and at least one (Dr. Ben Carson) has also been a successful neurosurgeon. We reject your celebration of communist supremacy and invite you to liberate yourself back to your homeland and commemorate your “independence” there, Colin.

Colin had a player option for 2017 worth $14.5 MILLION and rejected it. He thought that he could both stay in the league AND make more money by doing so, and he was wrong. So nobody colluded, Colin just fraked himself.

Mike concludes with “That’s the end of the story. The NFL wanted him out. The NFL kept him out. And now, it’s far too long for Kaepernick to get back in.” In Mike’s world, no leftist is ever responsible for their own actions, but it is ALL Colin’s own fault.

But with no NFL team willing to deal with his commie nonsense, he still has options. The British Columbia Lions of the CFL (Canadian Football League) have added Colin to their ‘negotiation list’, although that doesn’t mean anything if he is unwilling to play in Canuckia.

“Sack of shit”, by wilks2021, via 9gag.com. His adoptive parents were SO horrible that they adopted a racist alt-far-left half-black kid. They should have pulled a Spartan ‘300’ move and thrown him off of that cliff instead. Skeletons can’t take a knee!

A quick aside: it might bring in more leftist sponsor dollars, but what that meme above alludes to was uncalled for.

Contrast that to recently reading (and we highly recommend them all): ‘Harpo Speaks!’ by Harpo Marx, ‘Speaking of Harpo’ by Susan Fleming Marx (his wife), and ‘Son of Harpo Speaks!’ by William ‘Bill’ Woollcott Marx (his son), along with ‘The Garden of Allah’ by Sheilah Graham (which details life at a now long-gone famous hotel that famous people lived when in when in the Hollywood area, and which is named after the 2nd owner, silent film star Alla Nazimova and NOT the middle-eastern 1400-year-old death cult founder, although after she sold it they added the H to the end, which upset her greatly).

Those can all be found in the archive that Anna runs…

“Susan Fleming Marx – Speaking of Harpo”, by Cavalier Films LLC, via youtube.com. “Susan Fleming Marx talks about Harpo in an interview recorded in 2001.” Her own life was fascinating too. She never wanted to be an entertainer, but she was thrust into it by circumstance, then got out as soon as she could. The short video includes their 4 kids, including that image near the end of Chico, Groucho and Harpo holding the younger 3, with Bill standing (taken during filming of ‘At the Circus’ (1939). We get nothing from it, but you can order the book HERE.

We told you all of that to tell you this…Harpo and Susan couldn’t have children because of a hysterectomy she had in her 20’s for medical reasons, so they adopted all 4 of their children, beginning with Bill, and then adding Alex, Jimmy and Minnie several years later. Those kids appreciated that they were chosen!

But Colin, whose birth parents were a white mother and black father “whose identity is unknown” (despite them knowing he was “of Ghanaian, Nigerian, and Ivorian ancestry”), is simply ungrateful to his adoptive parents, who are both white.

“Funny Colin Kaepernick memes. Would have been funnier if it was Krusty Krab though. He looks like Squidward!”, by unknown, via pinterest.com. Or some cheese with all of that whine, Colin?

Had Colin spent more time on football (especially in those last couple of seasons), and less time on communism, then the 49ers would likely have won at least a few more games.

And now, since he likes doing it to other people and things (America, the NFL, 49ers, and his parents, to name just a few), in addition to crap, poop, deuce, shit, number two, and BM, we add ‘Kaep’ to the list of ways to describe taking a dump.

Continue Reading

Entertainment

Feces-Obsessed Sports Host & Lawyer Goes Off Script, Nobody Cares About Your White Communist Politics Mike Florio!!

Published

on

'white communist Mike Florio, based on template by KarenFlorio420 on twitter.com, with red words of truth by us. Their description..."NOT associated with Mike Florio or PFT. Just your average Karen reminding you to stay inside and be very afraid of the coronavirus. Cower in the corner with me" The left are terrorists, who want you perpetually afraid.
Spread the reality, RealityShed.Com --

So we were minding our own business, running some searches, and reading headlines, when we were accosted (luckily not Jim Acosta’ed) by extremism during a sweep of sports news. We don’t watch games any more, but we do still have childhood favorite teams we keep up on.

Imagine our surprise when we were suddenly told that TWITTER (we refuse to go along with that attempted re-branding, and as of this article can still access the site using that name) was filled with white people.

‘…horseturds…’, by JLGRobert, via imgflip.com. We don’t know that he actually ever used that word, but he is obsessed with crap.

Yes, despite common sense and thousands of years of history proving them wrong, alt-far-left-communist-democRATs are still trying to demonize white people. How racist of them! And it has been going on since President Trump came down the escalator on June 16, 2015.

They are also still trying to demonize being a nationalist, despite that phrase simply meaning someone who loves their own country more than any others.

They have also tried to merge the two things, as if there aren’t yellow nationalists in communist China, or brown nationalists in India, or black nationalists throughout Africa.

We will also point out that neither thing (being white, OR being a nationalist) is a crime, nor is being both, no matter how much the left try to make it criminal.

‘nonexistent’ by Karen Florio @KarenFlorio420, via twitter.com. Mike has blood on his hands, and will have for DECADES as more people die from the lies he helped push.

So who was spreading this tired-old dis-proven mentally questionable disinformation (which is always done intentionally, as compared to misinformation which might be by accident) this time?

Just in case you weren’t paying attention, since it was listed in the headline, it was Mike ‘white communist’ Florio, a sports opinion guy and former practicing lawyer…so he should both stick to his lane AND also know better.

Why did that jackhole say? Nothing worse than he has said before, which is why we stopped listening to him long ago. But this was, literally, right in our faces, so it was impossible to ignore.

“Woke Mike Florio LOSES IT and says NFL should PRESSURE Fox News into FIRING TUCKER CARLSON!”, by BlackandWhiteSports, via youtube.com. They added that “He also suggests Tom Brady should use his fame to pressure the NFL and Fox.” Tom likely has better things to do with his time than to try and get people fired. We don’t though, so please contact NBC to get Mike Florio fired for his communism.

In an article where he felt the need to repeat the phrase “Twitter, now known as X” FOUR fraking times in just 1043 characters (222 words), he attacked “prominent white nationalist accounts”[SIC] for correctly calling the NFL anti-white.

All pro-sports leagues (NFL, NBA, MLB, etc.) today are anti-white and also anti-American, and have been for years. We have prior proven they are even importing players to take the jobs of Americans (regardless of race). And they have done that while also pushing Florio’s own brand of woke leftism, which includes ‘the trans‘.

‘…overreacting’, by Karen Florio @KarenFlorio420, via twitter.com. The account seems to be abandoned now, but we thank it for the meme, and template (used for the main meme).

He also brought up something about a Buffalo Bills player dying from ‘the vaxx‘ and being replaced by “an actor”, and while admitting that only ONE account was pushing that story, he also tried to tar many with that strange accusation.

Why? Because Florio is a ‘the covid’ disinformation AND ‘the vaxx’ pusher.

We’ve also proven that it isn’t likely that a vaccine for that could have been developed in such a short amount of time, AND that the left have pushed ‘health products’ that have been proven to harm us before…including those containing MERCURY!!!

‘…woke mob…’, by The Gerry Callahan Show, via facebook.com. This wasn’t the first time we’ve seen Mike do this, but this one pissed us off enough to address.

Just like Mike, “we won’t name names or post links here”, except him because he deserves to be shamed.

Despite his love for leftist views, Florio was ‘outed’ for making comments like “”homos”, “fruits”, “queers” and “fudge packers”” on his own web site dating back to at least 2005, and only apologized in 2020 when someone went back through old articles there.

“Mike Florio screams about how the “woke mob” doesn’t exist. But he IS the woke mob! #GerryCallahanShow”, by The Gerry Callahan Show, via facebook.com. Great comment there…”Too bad Florio and Murchison can’t take a bath together with a toaster.” by Chuck Smith. No idea who Murchison is, but if he is friends with Florio…deserved!

Our standard disclaimer: we don’t hate ANYONE…except communists and the communist adjacent. That said, medically mutilating children (with drugs and/or surgery), as the British say, is “right out”.

In fact, Florio is actually STILL making such comments, as he JUST referred to San Francisco 49ers quarterback Brock Purdy as “Turdy” and said he can’t be a “franchise quarterback” because his last name sounds like that word for poop.

Even known fellow ass-hat leftist Peter King called that comment “one of the silliest things I’ve ever heard.”

We guess those two aren’t dating any longer now.

“I just listened to Mike Florio talk with Peter King and he gave the stupidest reason why Brock is still a wait and see QB. He said because his last name is Purdy and its not a franchise QB last name. Peter King even said it was the most ridiculous point he’s ever made. This is how i felt after.”, by u/MotherSecretary8302, via reddit.com. Now, what rhymes with Florio?

Mike’s site is now an affiliate of NBC Sports, which is owned by Com(munist)cast, aka Comcast, which also owns alt-far-left NBC and alt-far-lefter MSNBC (aka PMSNBC), Universal Pictures, USA Network, Bravo, Oxygen, E!, and also the now ruined Syfy (formerly Scifi, when it was good) and the streaming service Peacock, among other things. So you can actively practice avoidance of those.

And we will add that if a dishonest mental midget like Mike can make it through Law School and pass the Bar Exam, then anyone can. So if that is of any interest to you, go for it!

You can find us on social media here:
https://gab.com/MisterGoldiloxx
https://parler.com/MisterGoldiloxx
AND
https://gettr.com/user/realityshed
https://twitter.com/RealityShed
https://truthsocial.com/@RealityShed

Parler is likely gone for good as of April 14, 2023.
Twitter account abandoned May 12, 2023, after Elon Musk hired WEF’er Linda Yaccarino as new CEO.

NOTE: We post new content regularly, and have a Comment section here in the shed (below every article), so please use it and help build the Reality community. If you enjoy our work please consider supporting Reality by using the “DonorBox” donation link, or the ‘Buy Me a Coffee‘ donation link…or both. Either way please bookmark us and help spread the word to family and friends. Thank you.

Continue Reading

Entertainment

I’m As Fragile As Glass…Except When Banging A Porn Star, Pelicans PF Zion Williamson Represents Pansy Marxist NBA

Published

on

'Big Chungus', by InsanityGaming2, via imgflip.com. No, Zion isn't really a cartoon rabbit, but the rest is fairly accurate.
Spread the reality, RealityShed.Com --

While not writing, we did a lot of prep that we never used (writing headlines, finding or making memes, and even starting articles). Our motto is “if you think of something, type it in!”. It would be a shame if it went to waste, even if slightly dated. So one such topic is being merged with something that just happened.

Julius Erving, who just a year ago had his number officially retired across the entire NBA, recently released his all-time top 10 players list. Then he took a heap of grief for it, despite everyone being entitled to their own opinion, unless that opinion is communism (and then they are entitled to your opinion too, along with everything else you own).

“I have five guys who are untouchable – Bill Russell, Wilt Chamberlain, Oscar Robertson, Jerry West, and Elgin Baylor. That’s my all-time best team. …I made this decision when I was 15 years old. I’m sticking with it now all these years later.”, Erving said.

“2008 auction for 1976 Dr. J Julius Erving ABA All-Star Game Game-Used & Slam Dunk Contest Worn Uniform (Ball Boy LOA)”, by unknown, via greyflannelauctions.com. STILL the only player capable of signing his own dunk mid-click!

More than you would think were offended that he left current players off the list. ‘Dr. J’ explained that he only chose people whose careers were over. Cue more complaints.

Make your own list folks! THIS is the result of the monolithic thought being forced on us by leftists. If you don’t agree with what they believe (most often, wrongly), you are evil. We are surprised they haven’t called Julius a ‘white nationalist’ for leaving Lebron and Steph off of his list.

He also left probably the two most dangerous players at the end of a game off of his list: Michael Jordan and Larry Bird. If you are the opposing team, you definitely don’t want the ball in their hands with seconds left.

“Dr J dunking at 63 years old (extended footage)”, by unknown, via ballislife.com. This was 10 years ago but he could probably still do it. And AGAIN, the dunk was signed mid-click. Amazing!

Personally, we don’t follow sports like we used to. We do check how our favorite teams are doing from time to time, but we never watch games anymore. We read a lot instead. We’ve also grown partial to rugby, which we tried watching because we missed sports.

We missed sports, and gave it a…’try’…LOL…and find it superior to American football, which actually developed out of…rugby. They play both ways (offense and defense) and the action seldom stops.

That is a lot of ellipsis…ellipses…periods.

So far, we’ve just watched national teams play full 15 on 15 games, except for one 7 on 7 game which we found ridiculous. The USA team is currently ranked 18th in the world.

The sheer amount of teamwork surpasses anything we’ve seen in the NBA, NFL or MLB. Our one gripe is everyone ‘hook kicking’. Most of the time, they would make those just lining up straight on, even at an angle (for conversion kicks, after a ‘try’ they line up down the field from where they enter the ‘in-goal area’, which makes the kicks a lot more difficult than an ‘extra point’ in football).

We also haven’t seen anything woke in rugby except for ONE ad running on the digital signs during one game from a few years ago.

‘FULL GAME: All Blacks v South Africa (2021 – Townsville)’, “Strap yourself in for the All Blacks historic 100th Test against the Springboks.” — That is the New Zealand All Blacks vs the South Africa Springboks (which is a type of antelope found mostly in that country). These are usually two of the top national teams.

Now back to the racist drug-addict commies.

The only thing the NBA (or NFL or MLB) players and owners want is your time and money. They do NOT care about you at all! So why care about them, and why feed that obviously left-wing behemoth?

The recent NBA Collective Bargaining Agreement (or CBA, not to be confused with the NBA’s old feeder system, the Continental Basketball Association, which Detroit Pistons legend Isiah Thomas killed off), now allows marijuana use by players. So if you still watch that sport, just know that every fucking player on that court is high.

We are not 420 friendly, we are 420 hostile.

We probably lost a few of you there, and that is okay. We have our reasons. Our philosophy is that if you are going through life high or drunk (or both), then you are living wrong.

It is still a drug, and we were right when we said that those pushing it to be legalized and accepted would ultimately push it on kids, which they ended up doing with so-called edibles.

The alt-far-left has proven that all they need is a foot in the door (see gay ‘marriage’) and pretty soon they are chopping off dicks and tits, and pumping ‘the drugs’ into our kids.

“Zion Williamson when he hasn’t eaten for 30 minutes”, by Spicy_Urine, via reddit.com. This isn’t really Zion either, but he is known to eat a lot.

But that is a future article, and this one is about the most fragile men in the NBA. This current crop is incredibly soft (just like a MyPillow, or their Giza Dreams sheets; use promo code RealityShed or Reality Shed for a nice discount), and is likely the softest group to EVER play the game. Until then there was no such phrase as ‘load management’.

What should happen is paycheck management, as in if you don’t play you get paid less. Especially the bullshit Ben Simmons pulled. He is just one of several ‘Mr. Glass’ level players shamed, uhm, we mean named below.

Wow, this started off as such a simple writing idea. Zion and Dr. J. Oh well.

On Tuesday, June 6, 2023 (finally, this is the slightly older part…), Zion Williamson (aka ‘Mr. Glass’, like the villain character that the racist communist Samuel LEROY Jackson played in the super-hero trilogy [‘Unbreakable’ (2000), Split (2016), and Glass (2019)] by M. Night Shama Lama Ding Dong aka M. Night Shyamalan), announced he and his girlfriend were having a baby together.

‘Wait til Otis sees us’ from “National Lampoon’s Animal House” (1978), ‘Shama Lama Ding Dong’ song by Otis Day and the Knights. — We tried to find the entire scene, from when they pull the car into the bar’s parking lot until they flee the bar, but either nobody has put it up or the rights holder has it taken down when they do, so this was the best we could find.

Do you know what a child born out of wedlock is called? Illegitimate, or a bastard child. In fact, to promote promiscuity, the left now insists that that last term is offensive now. The bastards!

This is another example of the left changing our language to change society in the direction of their communism.

This is also similar to, what do you call someone who can speak a language but can’t read and write it? Illiterate. Equally true, although most people don’t feign offense at that.

Preparing for this, we saw a meme that started off with “The Zion Williamson Fanbase Is Dying”. Not entirely true, he is actually eating them off.

Anyway, porn star Moriah Mills followed Zion’s announcement with one of her own. She says that they have been having sex since 2021, and that he has promised to dump his girlfriend and be with Moriah. Mills even claimed that…gasp…she might also be pregnant.

Who cares, right? We only mention their ‘drama’ to point out that Zion’s many injuries haven’t prevented him from being a male slut.

His punishment for his actions (whoring and missing games) was…a 5-year rookie max extension worth at least $193 million, and possibly up to $231 million if he achieves certain incentives.

Zion has spent 4 seasons in the NBA, all with the New Orleans Pelicans. Entering the league in 2019-20 at 19 years of age. He has never played 82 regular season games in any season. He missed his entire 3rd season in 2021-22 with a foot injury. He has averaged 38.0 games a year (114 / 3) or 0.46342 of the games his team played. Pathetic!

‘Zion Williamson’, “NIKE; JUST SHOE IT!”, by berry2690, via imgflip.com. And when you eat a lot, THIS (his left shoe exploding) happens.

He isn’t alone though, and since we haven’t used this analogy in a few days, here is the rest of our NBA Fab Four of slack:

Kawhi Leonard has spent 12 seasons in the NBA, entering the league in 2011-12 at 20 years old: 7 seasons with the San Antonio Spurs, 407 games (the last season there he played just 9 games), one season with the Toronto Raptors 60 games, and 4 seasons with the Los Angeles Clippers (although he missed the entire 2021-22 season with an ACL injury). He has never played 82 regular season games in any season. He has averaged 57.091 games a year (628 / 11) or 0.6962 of the games his team played. Very not good!

Anthony Davis has spent 11 seasons in the NBA, entering the league in 2012-13 at 19 years old: 7 seasons with the New Orleans Hornets / Pelicans and 466 games played, and 4 seasons with the Los Angeles Lakers and 194 games played. He has never played 82 regular season games in any season. He has averaged 60.0 (660 / 11) or 0.732 of the games his team played. Fragile!

Ben Simmons has spent 7 seasons in the NBA, entering the league in 2016-17 at 20 years old. His first 5.5 seasons were spent with the Philadelphia 76ers, but he missed his entire first season with a foot injury, and also his last half season there claiming mental health issues, for 275 games played. He was then traded to the Brooklyn Nets and didn’t play his first half season there (claiming a back injury), before playing 42 games last season. He has never played 82 regular season games in any season (he just missed it in his second season, when he played 81). He has averaged 63.40 (317 / 5 played out of 7 in the league), or 0.7732 of the games his team played. Weak sauce!

Ben also thinks he is being paid to play “defense-ball” instead of basketball. Scoring is implied in the name of the game, dude!

And what of the fans who pay to attend these games thinking star players will be there and discover they overpaid for an incomplete product? Fraud!

“Kawhi Leonard – injury update”, ‘Spiderman Cancer’, by unknown, via makeameme.org. Kawhi isn’t really Spider-Man, but he does spend a lot of time injured.

We had already picked the antithesis of the current crop of players before seeing Dr. J’s actual list. And that player was…Wilt Chamberlain.

Unfair comparison? Hey, each of these guys all think they are the best player ever, so we will compare them to ONE of the best players ever. Or as piece of shit JJ Redick claimed, a guy who played against “firemen and plumbers”.

Wilt entered the NBA in the 1959-60 season at the age of 23. This was after 3 years of college and one year with the Harlem Globetrotters. Why? Back then, the NBA was sensical enough to not hire children. You couldn’t be drafted unless your college class had graduated, hence Wilt’s Globetrotters year.

He is listed as being active for 15 seasons, but he sat out his last season, 1973-74, in a contract dispute (see below).

‘Kawhi Leonard – Today I feel’, by Adam (Know Your Meme Universal Champion), via knowyourmeme.com. He is the Bill Belichick of NBA players.

His first 5.5 seasons were spent with the Philadelphia / San Francisco Warriors (they moved to SF before his 4th season). He was then traded to the new Philadelphia 76ers (the relocated and renamed Syracuse Nationals) in the middle of the season and remained there for 3.5 seasons.

He then spent the next 5 seasons with the Los Angeles Lakers, and when he didn’t sign his option year contract they insisted he was still required to play for them, but he had already signed with the ABA (American Basketball Association) San Diego Conquistadors as head coach and player for 2 seasons. A judge later ruled that he could coach but not play, siding with the Lakers.

Wilt ‘coached’ one season (with assistant Stan Albeck, who had also been an interim head coach before and would be a head coach again, actually doing most of the coaching, as it bored Chamberlain), then he retired.

‘Anthony Davis exits Game 6 with injury:’, by NBA Memes @NBAMemes, via facebook.com. This guy is more fragile than Taylor Swift’s ego. And for the record, if she were a Republican and living as she does she would STILL be a floozy.

This one really got away from us. Home stretch now though.

The number of games varied back then. It was 75 for the first season, 79 for the second, 80 each of the next 5 seasons, then 81 for one, and finally the current 82 for his last 6 seasons. That totals 1127 possible games his team played.

Wilt played 1045 regular season games (or .927241%) over 14 seasons for 74.643 games per season when the average played over those seasons was exactly 80.5 games.

He missed games in 5 seasons (3, 7, 1, 1 and 70). In his 11th season (1969-70) he played the first 9 games, rupturing his patellar tendon of his right knee in that last game, then came back for the last 3 games of the season AND the playoffs! They lost in the Finals in 7 games to the New York Knicks.

‘Anthony Davis after every game’, by NBA Memes @NBAMemes, via facebook.com. We had originally intended to make our own Mr. Glass meme with Zion, but when we found this we decided to not waste the time.

Over his career, Wilt averaged 30.1 points per game, including averaging 50.4 and 44.8 in back-to-back seasons, and including 7 other seasons over 30 points per game and 5 other seasons over 20 points per game. His last two seasons were his worst (14.8 and then 13.2).

He also averaged 22.9 rebounds per game over his career, 45.8 minutes per game (out of 48!), 4.4 assists and just 2.0 fouls per game (he never fouled out of a game). AND he claims to have slept with over 20,000 women, yet had no children (and thus no ‘baby-mommas’).

‘Only 1 Point?’, by unknown, via tooathletic.com. Spoof of Wilt Chamberlain’s 100 point game photo op.

His one weakness was caused by embarrassment. He could only shoot free throws accurately underhanded, like Rick Barry (89.3% career) did. He stopped doing that and fell into Shaq territory afterwards.

One coach suggested shooting them as jump shots, which is allowed, but he felt that would only call even more attention to his deficiency, and he ended his career at 51.1% FT made (he was 28 of 32 on FT in his 100 point game).

‘We All Know You Ain’t That Brave To Take That Shot…’, by unknown, via tooathletic.com. Dude was right under the basket during playoff games with the Atlanta Hawks and wide open, and he still refused to shoot (basically dunk). Of course he isn’t taking THIS shot!

Wilt was also a Republican who denounced black nationalists, including the Black Panthers, and he even attended MLK Jr’s funeral with Richard Nixon, who he supported for President in 1968 and 1972.

Lastly, in Wilt’s last season, at 36, he set a FG% record (.727) that stood from 1972-73 until 2019-20, and is still #2 all-time for a single season. He actually still holds 3 spots in the top 23 for that category.

‘useless…’, “Ben Simmons was the reason why Sixers didn’t resign Jimmy Butler”, by NBA Memes, via facebook.com. Hadn’t heard this rumor, but it could be true. Butler hates slackers.

This could be done with any number of good quality players, not just with Wilt. The entire point is that modern guys can play, they just can’t stay on the court BUT they want to be paid as if they did.

They just don’t make them like they used to! The NBA is now a league of soft racist (that is what BLM is) potheads pushing cultural marxism.

‘Wilt Chamberlain 100’, by Paul Vathis for AP, via nhregister.com. Playing for the Philadelphia Warriors, Chamberlain holds a sign reading ‘100’ in the dressing room in Hershey, Pennsylvania, on March 2, 1962, after the Warriors defeated the New York Knickerbockers 169-147. That was a regulation game too (no overtime)! And note that the rest of his team managed 69 points…

EDIT: 08/18/2023, We don’t normally come back to add to an article, but we just discovered this short video and wish we had seen it before publishing so it could have been added to the article then.

‘When Magic Johnson Was Challenged By An Old Wilt Chamberlain’ — Hall of Fame Coach Larry Brown confirms story about UCLA pickup game between Magic Johnson plus 4 NBA stars (Bernard King, and 3 Lakers teammates: James Worthy, Byron Scott and AC Green) vs a 43-year-old Wilt Chamberlain playing with 4 UCLA Freshman players. The Lakers had just won the NBA Championship (when Magic started at Center for the injured Lew Alcindor) right before this happened…

You can find us on social media here:
https://gab.com/MisterGoldiloxx
https://parler.com/MisterGoldiloxx
AND
https://gettr.com/user/realityshed
https://twitter.com/RealityShed
https://truthsocial.com/@RealityShed

Parler is likely gone for good as of April 14, 2023.
Twitter account abandoned May 12, 2023, after Elon Musk hired WEF’er Linda Yaccarino as new CEO.

NOTE: We post new content regularly, and have a Comment section here in the shed (below every article), so please use it and help build the Reality community. If you enjoy our work please consider supporting Reality by using the “DonorBox” donation link, or the ‘Buy Me a Coffee‘ donation link…or both. Either way please bookmark us and help spread the word to family and friends. Thank you.

Continue Reading

Advertisement

Trending

Copyright © 2022, 2023, 2024 Reality Shed.